What A Therapist Might Tell You About Redesigning Yourself and Choosing Your Life

What A Therapist Might Tell You About Redesigning Yourself and Choosing Your Life

What A Therapist Might Tell You About Redesigning Yourself and Choosing Your Life

Lets start with this: Who are you, really?

If you can’t answer this question immediately and confidently, please read on.

The depths to which we understand our authentic selves intricately affects every part of our lives.

And if we are able to obtain a deeper understanding of who we are, we not only will be able to craft more meaningful connections with ourselves and others, but we also can tap into opportunities and insights which help build relationships that are more unique, authentic, and real.

Sometimes though, we need help obtaining these deeper understandings.

Therapists are those skilled individuals who are expertly trained to help us shed light upon our darkest parts.

Lets go ahead and find out just exactly who you are.

1. Who Are You? Are You Choosing Your Life?

I ask you this. Do you really know who you are?

Essentially, all that makes up you is emotions, how you choose to present to the world, behave toward others, and treat yourself.

Of those parts, which did you actively, intently, and purposefully choose to create? And which parts chaotically entered your life, idly becoming a part of your identity?

These are important questions to ask; as the many relationships we choose to create are reflections of our internal character.

You also have the ability to become almost any version of yourself, choose who you are and what happens within your life, even if sometimes it does not appear that way.

Now, there are some real-world limitations, and as you will see in most cases these roadblocks are products of irrational beliefs.

But ask yourself, what is really preventing you from bridging that gap and making real the person you could choose to become?

Most often becoming that person is as easy as moving to action, and giving yourself permission to step out onto the diving board.

At the end of the day, it is feelings that so often trick us into believing we are capable of less than we are, they drive our actions, manipulate the beliefs we hold about ourselves, and encourage us to operate off of unreliable foundations.

So, what does one do?

Be bold! Literally choose your life, and base your assumptions of who you can become not off of how you feel and who you are now, but off of what you want to achieve. Make who you are a decision.

2. Do You Have Deceptive Narratives?

We all have those stories, which we tell ourselves repeatedly, and for some reason we find sick comfort in their familiarity, even if their contents are negative or false.

Did we decide these stories? Or are we just used to hearing them?

Words and expectations have a powerful effect on the ways we may achieve transformation, or slip into decay, and it can be somewhat confusing to know which narratives we wrote, and which were written for us.

By not choosing our stories, we give power to those who instill in us negative narratives, and effectively let them take partial ownership in the design of our relationships, and lives.

So, make sure it is you that has written all of your narratives!

Become your own personal editor. Rearrange and challenge all of your unconscious stories. Separate your core-identity, from the false narratives which tell you to identify as shameful, enraged, and solemn. Then decide which to keep and which to purge.

3. Fuel Yourself!

Who, or what fills you up inside?

We derive immense pleasure from outside attention and adoration, however there can be a dilemma when we stop, or never use, internal soothing, and instead regulate our well-being based off of external cues.

Build up yourself, and look inside for love and encouragement.

It is also important to think of the world one lives in as a tool for continual growth and inspiration, needing to be hand-crafted in order to lift-up one’s dreams and achievements to fruition.

Trim away activities which deplete you, rather than rejuvenate your vision, and design the world you live in to accurately reflect the person you set out to become.

Live from the inside-out, and imprint your unique creative self, mark of wisdom, and ideas upon the world, rather than letting the rest of the world extinguish your voice, and determine your self-worth.

All this, however, will only manifest if you live from the inside-out.

4. Become Your Best Friend

When was the last time you treated yourself like you might treat your best friend?

We often forget that we ourselves are people too. We make ourselves exceptions, and present, treat, and talk to others very differently than we would ourselves.

We communicate with ourselves passively, and with less intent than we deliver to others. We don’t give ourselves compliments, take time for ourselves, advocate for our needs, and we let the negative voices in our heads take control. Then we are perplexed as to why we experience emotions such as insecurity, sadness, and depression.

When you make yourself an exception to the rule, you are not giving yourself permission to grow, fail and achieve.

After all, it is the repetition of the actions and behaviors we demonstrate which instill in us our most definitive truths.

Become your best friend!

5. Fail Well and Efficiently

Do you enjoy failure? Start to!

Quite often we are more inclined to choose the safe, less emotional provoking route. Yet when we do not give ourselves permission to fail, we in turn are robbing ourselves of the chance to truly succeed and become great.

Do not underestimate yourself.

Fail like your success is prepared to be built upon the confident knowledge that you have no further to fall, and up is the only direction left.

As I propose to you this: failure is not falling, it is not failing, but just another part of continual success.

All this happens from knowing yourself.

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